OK, we get it, you a punchline rapper, but a lot of ‘em reaches
I’ll give you credit - every once in a while, you drop somethin’ decent
So you cheffin’, I heard Raekwon from your region
He shoulda told you you ain’t cookin’ with the proper ingredients
Your recipe? A cup of jokes, a teaspoon of cockin’ and squeezin’
A pinch of some Pokémon shit that we not really feelin’
See, the bars too bland in the pot that you steamin’
And that’s the obvious reason that you not really seasoned!
You throw the same punches so you get, caught in a sequence
They so telegraphed, opponents just dodge ‘em and weave ‘em
That’s when I catch him with a blow and keep, constantly beatin’
‘Til he can’t feel his face like that song from the Weeknd!
You gotta be fuckin’ odd if you thought we was even
He’s a, thousand leagues beneath me
I had to part the sea just to partially see him
Pull him up to pick him apart, target his weakness
Rip the darkest and deepest part of his heart out and squeeze it!
I am everything you’re not, this is God sonning Jesus
You’re a mark, just a carcass for the sharks that I’m feedin’
Torn apart when I smell the blood from the bodily lesions
I’m GodBody, I’ll body you! You embody a heathen!
Dog, lemme teach you a lil’ history lesson
Before you was playin’ GoldenEye and developed your lil’ pistol obsession
I was 15, filled wit’ aggression
Battlin’ grown men in neighborhoods where they willin’ to kill any second
What you know about bein’ that young and sneakin’ in clubs
Hidin’ behind speakers between battles, fuckin’ peein’ in cups
I been out here fuckin’ ‘em up, before Jae Millz yelled out, “B.I.G! Am I trouble or what!?”
Before Lux battled Mook in a shoe store
Before Facebook, when dudes would talk less and actually shoot more
Before 8 Mile, before Em’ made it safe to rap if you white
I dropped four albums since then, two of ‘em charted
Top 10 on iTunes, makin’ moves as an artist
Did a tour wit’ the most poppin’ dude in the market
You was still in Ground Zero bein’ viewed as a target
But even after all the money, all the groupies and nonsense
That Osa battle still occupied room in my conscience
I still cringe when I log on to YouTube and watch it
I get damn near nauseous when I’m viewin’ the comments
See, I still got the win, but I truthfully lost it
I let my fans down – now I’m here to prove I’m a monster
So I had to do myself a service like a Reverend
Round 2’s when we get his funeral started!
[Round 1: Lexx Luthor]
Hold it down, hold it down
Little Matthews! Little Matthews!
You’re only here because you’re Pat’s friend and got a couple conversation referrals
They flew me to L.A., Atlanta, and Vancouver
I never fainted or ‘urled
I battled in London on the way to battle in Africa, different nations and girls
I earned my spot on World Domination by dominatin’ the world
After my battle with Mega, man, I learned to power a punch
They gon’ think you joined a gang ‘cause I’mma put you down from the jump
Listen, Quack, I’m surprised you don’t start your rounds wit’ a cluck
It’s ironic this bird ain’t suited for the bill, but looks like Howard the Duck
You be kissin’ teenagers in your music videos
Before you fuck a girl, go get some advice
I bet he listens to “Eye of the Tyga” when in bed wit’ his wife
Now don’t come close, or I’ll play Whack-a-Mole on your head wit’ my knife
And you gon’ see The Saurus in the mirror for the rest of your life!
While you were tourin’ wit’ Classified and his he-she friends
I was gettin’ the game poppin’ off-screen like a 3DS
Slangin’ dope at the gas station, I’ll have you noddin’ out before the squeegee wet
On the road, dog (Road Dogg), we lay the smack down (SmackDown) and triple H like we DX!
If it ain’t in Ground Zero, it don’t count, and I’m a GZ vet
For the chain, I’m like Dexter in the lab: DD’s (Dee-Dee) next!
But they wanna see me beat Prep, Brizz, Saga, or that peewee Chess
I’ll get NuBorn’s girlfriend pregnant and push her down the PG Steps!
If Pat writes a throwaway, you’ll see sport jack it (jacket): he on his letterman swag
Can someone tell Turtle from Entourage that Lexx in his bag?
I’ll hack the pay-per-view and get you ripped off the polls (poles): Confederate flags
Get a butt in your chin for talkin’ fishy: I’m your American Dad!
And you look like the kid from Recess
[Round 2: Quake Matthews]
Alex, you are not from the slums of Shaolin
I got the facts to prove it
Matter fact, I’ll do you one better…I got the motherfuckin’ Staten Island map to prove it
(*A woman in Quake’s corner holds up a full-color map of Staten Island, New York, Lexx’s hometown*)
See- hold that up high, please
See…(*points to the upper right corner*) this is the slums, where they poppin’ them Llamas
No, it’s over there (*points to the upper left corner*)
That’s where Wu from
(*drags his finger down to the lower left corner*) All the way down here is where old women are walking Chihuahuas
That’s where you from
See, the fans don’t know the difference, so you try to confuse them
Claimin’ “slums of Shaolin” to provide an illusion
You from Tauntonville, Alex! Tauntonville!
Golf courses and soccer fields!
Wu from Park Hill, where they shoot, rob, and kill
So don’t talk like you poppin’ a semi-auto when you rep’ there
When it would take you 45 fucking minutes by auto just to get there!
Shut the fuck up! Don’t lie – I GPS’ed that shit!
If Ghostface was here right now, he’d tell you, “You’re not a G – P.S. Don’t rep’ that shit!”
The average home where you’re from? $464,000
Old-style architecture, close to the water
So why you wanna be hardcore!? Go play a par-4
Do yourself a favor – stop fuckin’ up this art form!
And why you got them gun bars for?
Dog, have you ever seen a homicide? When them hollows fly
You know, that shit that leave a grown man traumatized?
When one of your dogs outside wit’ bullets lodged inside of his chest cavity, staring back wit’ them haunting eyes
You hear screams from onlookers who walkin’ by
That’s when the cops arrive, wit’ the chalk outlines
Askin’ you questions you can’t answer ‘cause you honour pride
Plus you thinkin’ ‘bout his son not havin’ father time
It makes you wanna cry, and that’s the shit you glorify!?
Man, you just talk about ratchets for the sake of reactions
Of the fans in the stands, for the sake of them clappin’
It make me sick to my stomach, ‘cause I witnessed it happen!
And that’s the difference between real life and just rappin’
Rest in peace, Nukem! Rest in peace, Nukem!
Rest in peace, Nukem!
[Round 2: Lexx Luthor]
Yo…I see you brought an antic wit’ you
That shit is wack
All the props in the world couldn’t put you on the map
If he got beef, I got it covered: think ravioli
He can catch a shell over some cream: that’s cannolis
You in Nova Scotia livin’ the sweet (Suite) life like Zack and Cody
Well, keep it rap, jabroni, ‘cause this tre rings like Shaq and Kobe
I’m on my PH anime shit, we way past shinobis
I’m fat and quick wit’ a weapon like Yajirobe
You wanna go? Cool (Goku)
Pops show you the beam like Master Roshi
Dragon Ball Z bars: this cat could rot (Kakarot) in this match wit’ Broly!
Dragon Ball Z shit
They put Kreayshawn against Raekwon
Scratch that – I just showed Africa the light: I’m feelin’ like Akon!
I don’t need to hustle anymore
Me and battle rap are gettin’ our cake on
My pen got me out of the trap: I’m like James Bond!
Whassup!? Whassup!? I’m gettin’ crazy, baby…
We can get it shakin’ in the pit
That goes for you and everyone you wit’
In the midst of chaos is opportunity – I’ve read all of Sun Tzu’s scripts
So pop off, Bobby Hill
I’m from the Shaolin, get your front tooth chipped
Fuck you, bitch
Mouthin’ off while I’m punchin’ like a kung fu flick
Suck a dick, rookie!
In the battle scene, you got, like, what, two vids?
I been doin’ this since I was 15 on 1-2-5th!
Freestylin’ wit’ a drum on the table, every rapper in the lunchroom quit
‘Cause caps stem from the bullshit: I was on a mushroom trip
Listen, Baby Hollohan…
You just loud and animated – fuck the noise
Just have a ball and run wit’ it: take the rugby choice
Or think Knoxville wit’ the Hot Wheels
Jackass, I really dump these toys
And always bring a body to the table like the Dudley Boyz
I’mma give this pro pain (propane), since he looks like Bobby Hill
You shoulda learned from Norbes, pussy: guard your grill!
And your hairline looks like Magneto’s helmet
[Round 3: Quake Matthews]
Yo, how is the fat kid callin’ me Bobby Hill?
Organik, tell his whole entourage, “Chill”
He brought drama, so that’s gon’ get Turtle from Entourage killed
I already told you that! Fuck off…
And what the fuck is up wit’ that Nova Scotia shit?
You got 87 on your shirt, that’s Sidney Crosby
Get off Nova Scotia’s dick!
Battling you is an all-time low for me
Do you understand how this makes me look to my fans and my fam’ that is close to me?
I saw the online trailer like, “Wait a minute…what the fuck?
Quake Matthews versus Lexx? I thought you said Lux”
When my dude saw the poster, he put his hand on my shoulder and hugged me
Said, “Quake, you know I’m your buddy
Don’t ever be embarrassed if you need to borrow some money
And I can take you to the grocery store tomorrow if you’re hungry.”
He goes, “Trust me – you can swore from the bottom
But in the meantime, I got some old shirts I never wear and some extra pairs of Jordans and shorts in my closet that are yours if you want ‘em”
See, my friends are confused ‘cause I’m bigger than you
Well, maybe not…bigger than you, but bigger than you
So let me get serious for a minute wit’ you
Dog, you are a pathetic, hypocritical, cowardly individual
You try and swing now, I promise I’ll disfigure you
Finish you, get you curled up like a Hasidic Jew
Yo, check it, listen
And what I find hard to believe?
He worked so fucking hard just to be here sparrin’ wit’ me
So here we are, World Domination 5, the card of his dreams
The funny thing is, to me, it’s just a marketing scheme
My iTunes money good, I never lost any sleep
Dog, you wanderin’
To me, it’s just a walk on the beach
But you a cocksucker that’s lost in the flock of the sheep
‘Til I clip him, and then trim him, and then stitch him into a motherfuckin’ Nautica fleece
Listen…what is the two-year plan for you?
Dog…(*stammers a little*)
What is the two-year plan for you?
How many more battles do you plan to do
Knowing there is no chance in Hell there could ever be a champ for you?
Dog, listen…I know that you motherfuckin’ wack, dog
Listen, look, check it, check it, check it
Fuck it, cut it off, man
I can’t talk, cut it, man
No-no-no! Don’t make noise, ‘cause he doesn’t deserve it!
Fuck that – go
It’s true! Don’t blame me – it’s true
[Round 3: Lexx Luthor]
Yo, you talkin’ ‘bout Sidney Crosby? I don’t care what you said, bitch
He plays for Pittsburgh, he had to go to the States to get rich
Come on – give it up!
Listen, I said, I opened the card to take money out…like it’s my birthday
What I write shakes peers (Shakespeare): I know the word “play”
The crowd gon’ be tweetin’ my bars, I’ll get this bird caged
He choked, so he shook
It’s gon’ be groundbreakin’ when I earth Quake!
His name’s Matthew Arab
Half his family’s from Lebanon and the rest from Iran
Trust me, I think it’s radical the way you mess wit’ Islam
That was good, that was good
I bet when you go to the movies, you dress as Saddam
Like, “Can I have one for Suicide Squad, please? I know – this vest is the bomb!”
You dumbed your music down to pop recently, and made it soft
But not for money, ‘cause lack of creativity’s your fatal flaw
Your last album’s called Rap Music
Is that what you named it, dog?
I bet when your mom bought you a puppy, you fuckin’ named it “Dog!”
Your whole catalog’s a trainwreck, and I ain’t talkin’ weed flavor
I hunt rapper sleepin’ on me: I’m a Dreamchaser
This whippin’ you can’t mock (Mach), 5: ask Speed Racer
I’ll have him (*smack*) spinnin’ after the punch like Qleen Paper!
If they say he hustle in the field, it’s ‘cause he a team player
I pop up while you not pushin’ ki’s (keys): screensaver
Get tied up in the trap, pussy
If I can’t find a clean razor, you gettin’ cut with blow on the blade like the Green Ranger
I started battlin’ in front of PH, Pen, and Immortal Technique, but that was back in the ghetto
We used to battle on the rooftop, and the loser’s mom got “Dance with the Devil’d”
I give a fuck about your experience in the game!
Try to advance and get leveled
I was bred (bread) on the path to cook kids like Hansel and Gretel!
You gettin’ out-lined, don’t try to chalk a New Yorker
You not welcome on my side – don’t get accustomed to crossin’ the border
You’ll never be the champ of this league just ‘cause you got the Sucka Free Boss in your corner
Ayo, Pat! That’s how you talk to your daughter!
WHO YOU!? (Nobody!)
Welcome back to battle rap, pussy!
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